Will you go?

Many if not all of us know people from far to near-and-dear who have had a crisis over various gospel issues, themes, doctrines, historical evens, social dynamics, business, triangulations, gossip, etc. In any one of these things is something where any one of us may feel that everyone else is oblivious to the thoughts, questions, and/or incompleteness of the thing to which one struggles with. We struggle when we know something presented or present is not entirely perfect- within our understanding or within the idea itself. We have an unending strain of questions but our anxiety gets the better of us if we lack patience. It is at a time like this that we are vulnerable to temptation to give in- either by believing that the question is not a good one and has no place in the universe, or blaming our frustration on others, the thought or idea, ourselves, or upon God. We want answers to millions of questions and we wonder, "God, it is only from you and your laws that I truly believe that my proper knowledge and understanding can bear any solid ground-- what other people say and do obvious is not the foundation I can build upon for truth of all things." So we turn our questions over to God.But many people who have turned to God for a time about the myriads of seemingly unanswered questions have left... not just "the Work" or "Mormonism" or "Christianity"But they have truly left it all- they have left out Christ and God altogether.Questions set all mankind into the realm of the two things that set the destiny of all souls: what we know and what we don't know- and what we do with what ever it is we do know. We lay in between gnostic and agnostic and God as our teacher and parents. Belief in ones self can only be true if one can hold to the core that we are the Children of God- for what other aim of the soul, and what greater cause for God or ourselves? Shall we then base the state of our souls on the things we know or the things we don't know? And shall we set our standard by the virtues of God or by the average to which men aspire as the norm of virtue?I have asked myself this question: When people are struggling with questions and the vices of others- to what end will it take them in the end? To what end the struggle? Victory over evil or a dying soul becomes the final lot. Every one that leaves the Work, or denies the Church, or denies Christ or God, does so because they say they are running from incorrect ideas, ignorance, or fleeing from tyranny and falsehoods, and from hell itself. But what have they left to? When Christ asked his disciples "Will you go also?" where was every one going to? - each to his own way.When you see people leave, do you see them saying or do any of the following:"I have had the spirit touch my soul and whisper peace and joy to me in confirming it is ok to leave and go-- wherever the wind takes me."Do you see people that Deny Christ and the Book of Mormon become full of the spirit of love and start teaching others to live by virtues and principles that will bring them happiness?When people leave, did they say "God has told me that this was the right thing to do?"When they left, did they leave to something more whole and more perfect?when they left, did they become more kind and compassionate than before?when they left, do they become more vigilant in teaching their children and friends about the laws of Christ?''Did they do so with loving kindness?''Did they do so because others had shut them out of their circles or because they had shut every one else out of their circle?''Did it bring the better welfare of their family and loved ones?''Were they making or breaking a relationship?''Did they do so based upon conviction or the lack of it?''Did they do it out of an excuse against their consciousness to principle?When they left, What grander or greater ideas, hopes, and practices of charity and belief in God did they go to that is more beautiful than what Christ has already given?''Were they taking a step up or a step down?Where they thinking long-term or short-term states for themselves and their children?Of those who have left, remember them and all their children and ask yourself to the direction to which they aspire.Of those who have left, will their children love and trust their parents more for it?Is love, virtue, service, need for soul searching and knowledge, and a need for Christ perpetuated more or less in the homes of those who have left?Were they reading constructive or destructive literature when they left?Were they becoming more and more happy in the process of confusion, doubt and rejection of dependency of the Spirit of God?As for myself, I do not always have God's Spirit. I believe in knowing all I can but I am far from knowing everything and I have proven myself to be full of vices that need correction. But my faith and hope in God is not built upon where I am confused, disoriented, or in the dark, or where I don't have the answer to something yet. When the light is given and our eyes are open is the best time to make a judgment of what is most correct- but even then one step at a time. When were are unhappy, miserable, or confused is the least appropriate time to be making a judgment about what is most correct. Gods Spirit is like the light-- for it alone can lead. As they teach in wilderness survival: If you are lost and disoriented or in the dark, it is a really bad idea to start getting up and wander around, for chances are you will get yourself even more lost than before. If you can not make a good decision for going somewhere that you know is better, the best decision is to just stay put for a while and not make a decision about going anywhere for the moment. If you feel lost and in the dark, just stay put until the sun comes up and your mind is more clear.